4.03.2006

Sick part 2

Aside from being physically sick I'm beginning to get sick of Korea. I've been here almost two and half years and it's starting to lose its appeal. I think back to the days when I first arrived in Korea and the first year or so of living here and I remember an excitement, a newness to it. I felt as if I was doing something interesting, something most people will never get a chance to do. I was exploring, having adventures, meeting new people from all over the world and generally just having a really great time. In fact, it was one of the best times of my life.

That feeling, however, has gone away. As I mentioned in a previous post Korea now feels like a place where I live rather than an exotic place to explore. Now, I'm starting to resent Korea as a result. I'm sick of the blandness of the food. I'm sick of the rudeness of the people. The drunk ajjossis harassing you or wanting to practice English. The way too cute, princess-disease laden young girls. The deceptiveness that is so rampant here. The young men who are either intimidated because I'm a western person or, alternatively, want to be my friend for the same reason. The lack of anything beautiful or even mildly visually interesting. In general, I'm sick of Korea and Koreans and everything associated with them.

However, I say that to say this. I know these things that I point to as being annoying or the cause of my bitterness aren't really the cause at all. All, of the things that I listed and numerous others have, at one time or another, been part of what I loved so much about Korea. I can remember enjoying the drunken old men and their screaming at each other over countless bottles of soju. I remember finally giving in to "cuteness" of Asia and putting a Winnie the Pooh charm on my cell phone (I know. Forgive me.).

I know the problem isn't Korea or Korean people. The problem is that I'm bored. I've always had to do new things, go to new places, try things I'd never tried before. And frankly, I've sampled most of what Korea has to offer. The first year or so I spent a lot of time partying and meeting new people and I loved it. But, even that has lost it's appeal to me because it's the same thing rehashed continuously.

I don't know what the solution is and I don't mean to come off as whinny. These are just the thoughts that have been running through my head lately. I've thought that maybe, once this contract is finished, it's time to head for a different country and try teaching there, but I can't decide on a location and I am not entirely sure it won't just be same shit-different country.

There was a lot more I wanted to put in this post, but being as I'm sick and on very little sleep I'm having a hard time putting the words together. So, I'll leave it at that for now.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

feel better

Anonymous said...

cheer up buddy!!!!!!! You could always move to Newfoundland.

Anonymous said...

I may not really know the solution but changing location may also not be solving the problem, not to say that is a bad idea. What else apart from doing new and exciting things do you want to do?